This blog was inspired by my friend Hazel, who writes the beautiful Seven Sisters blog which you can find at http://sevensisterslove.com. Her writing creates a natural magic that I don’t see in my part of the UK, plus a stunning natural environment.
Life makes the world go around
Living makes a life, not money. In this day and age in the West it is brilliant to have money because everything costs so much, yet we seem to be wealthy but our levels of poverty are shocking in the extreme. More people than ever before are starting to struggle due to the rising cost of living, that seems only to have one direction.
It doesn’t matter that we have billionaires and there will soon be trillionaires, and it all sounds great. However, the level of poverty should always be the definition of a country’s success. The lower the level of poverty the better you’re doing. I’m not impressed at the moment.
Money as a pressure
Personally we have become progressively better off in terms of figures, but life has become increasingly more expensive. Whilst Tony’s wages have increased by 3 in 30 years, food alone has increased by 5 times. We’ve definitely gone backwards while personally still being fortunate, and grateful for that. That doesn’t alter what others are going through though.
People in the UK easily earn enough money to have a house, a car, food, heat, light, water, and yet formerly eye watering amounts of money can’t provide those basic necessities. Getting wealthier doesn’t count for much if the economy isn’t growing and prices are skyrocketing.
A different kind of fortune
Her life must have its hardships to overcome, but the natural way she lives is enviable. The scenery outside her windows. Fresh picked food. Family at the centre of her life. It seems so much more real.
These are the things I was raised with in South London. No scenery as such, but fresh food, meat, and fish, from local farms. We didn’t have a refrigerator so you bought food daily in the summer and it lasted a bit longer in the winter. A far more natural life, with its hardships yes, but we knew what mattered because money wasn’t in the way. It was way more real.
When I was 6 we moved up and things got worse.
A wealthier life
We left our poverty stricken but friendly community behind, and oh how mum and I didn’t want to. We left friends. We left laughter in that condemned house. We left joy behind with the rotten floorboards, in exchange for a ‘better lifestyle.’
What I wouldn’t give for my brother and cousin to have known that life full of laughter and insane behaviour, in a close and loving family, and a friendly area.
My grandfather died, a seismic shock went through the family, Nan didn’t want to live alone, a bigger house was needed, she gave dad the deposit providing she would always have a home with them, which she did. We moved to Beckenham in Kent (at the time). Mum and I never settled.
Why oh why did my dad have to spend his early childhood in Beckenham?!
It was so entirely different. Way less friendly, although we were lucky that some lovely neighbours moved in a few weeks later. Thank you God.
Beckenham was posh! The house was better but it was the difference between living in a nice warm oven and a freezer. It didn’t hug you. Neither mum nor I looked back the day we moved out.
Yes dad had a better job, but mum had to work to help pay for the house so my brother didn’t have the same childhood. We were blessed to have Nan there to stand in, we both agree on that, but it’s not the same as those 6 years I had with mum. He never had that and it’s not fair.
He didn’t have her around, and it’s something that’s often absent in today’s society because both parents, if there are both parents, have to work. In my youth it was difficult because women didn’t traditionally work but so many dad’s died in the war, yet even so the closeness of society helped to hold things together.
It’s so very important and so very absent in today’s society. Dear God it’s unbelievably important that children don’t grow up alone from 8-6 five days a week, with parents running around like maniacs at the weekend to prepare for the week ahead.
When I moved to Croydon with Tony the family were appalled, it was such a shift down market, but I found a life there I recognised. Friendly. Chatting on the bus. Mixed races. Smiles. It was a definite upscaling for me.
The point
In the West we’re seduced by the nonsense of stuff! Social media to replace real connections. Big expensive, but ordinary, cars.
When I read Hazel’s blog I see a reality where you’re not forced into working ridiculous hours to maybe be able to afford food, which many in our society still can’t. Where you can be with those you love.
They probably do struggle, but with their sustainable lifestyle, growing their own food, do they feel that to be a struggle? Sometimes probably, but they have so much beauty around them to take a moment to appreciate, and that’s a gift from God. I hope it’s never taken from them by man.
We have square boxes surrounded by square boxes. Doors we slam and lock. Curtains we close. Hearts we close. Lives we shut down to have time to work. Modern slavery disguised as employment.
We’re making people work later and later in life before they can retire. Our new government’s first attack wasn’t on the wealthy, wasn’t on Non-domicile status where the rich keep their money abroad in tax havens because they have a house there. No, it was on pensioners Winter Fuel Allowance, which resulted in thousands of them having to apply for more benefits.
If you wrote that as a play people would say it lacked believability. Three times now they’ve taken from those with less than nothing to give.
Which brings me to:
Younger people
Don’t fall for this. Don’t fall for social media as a way of life. Don’t work until you drop, and have strangers for children.
Don’t lock those doors, pull those curtains. Embrace the world. Have friends. Be social. Know each other. Play with your kids.
It’s what virtually every parent really wants at the heart of things, to have a child not see it in passing. Many parents in the UK do a fantastic job, but many lose a lot due to the shape of our society, whilst giving every ounce of energy to doing their best.
If you isolate your life will die. It needs fresh air and new connections to thrive. To be out there and live.
Don’t have super expensive houses, phones, computers, cars, furniture, stuff. Have fun and holidays and experiences. Live, laugh, love.
Be alive, and the more naturally alive the better.
Less stuff means more living. That’s what I see in Hazel’s blogs, real connection and a sense of purpose. A life lived under the sun with people she loves.
Deb xx
Deb Hawken - Amorah 