As you may already know, I walk a spiritual path, or try to. I long ago became realistic about being spirit in the human world, and don’t try for the flowing robes and carefree hair, barefoot in the grass, type approach. I’m not cynical, it just doesn’t work for me. There’s too much damned reality out there, and of course you can’t change the reality of others.
I used the word damned not as a swear word but as a fact. To many crazy mixed up people doing far too much damage in all areas of life and all walks of life. I’m not being a negative nelly, I just watch the news. Yes I know a lot is dramatised, but far too much is not.
I HATE approaching any form of negativity or negative speak, but I’ve actually concluded that trying to be good and decent, honourable and truthful in this world, is not a good thing. I haven’t reached cynic status yet, nor am I wearing a tin foil hate in case they are trying to steal my brainwaves. 🤣 Good luck to them if they are that alone would prevent any alien invasion!
Let me explain. I genuinely try to treat the world in the way I would wish to be treated. I’m no saint I’ve just been hurt so many times I truly don’t want to be that person. I want people to feel good around me, safe, supported, able to be themselves warts and all without any judgement coming from this direction. It’s why I write.
I make mistakes, I’m very human, and to me that should make you more compassionate…But…
Gratitude can suck
Odd statement I know, but as with all good things it’s how you use them that counts. One of the reasons the wheels often come off the lives of good people, human people who try so hard to be what they believe in, is that they forget to put themselves into the equation. They forget that they are as deserving as everyone else of a happy, content, peaceful, loving and loved life. Loving goes out…love coming in provides you with a much needed top up.
It’s true that you can get that love from Source Energy, insert name of your deity or joy in nature. Add in pets and those are the three most healing things in this world in my experience, accompanied by some beautiful background music. You can get such great feelings from all those things. But let’s be real here..
Don’t be too good
It is very difficult to remain in that great space of whatever makes you the happiest, when metaphorically speaking you’re staggering around with several knives of human angst in your back. But let’s work with the negative here…
When you’re trying to walk a spiritual path, or just be a good person, you’re often accused of being selfish if you stand up for yourself.
It is worth remembering that we are trained to be good in order to keep us acquiescent. Train someone to be good and you have endless opportunities to use their humanity to keep them in place. If you’re a loving parent raise a rebel with a heart of gold.
It’s also worth remembering that making you wrong gives others that wonderful feeling of being both right and superior. This is not good for them or you. It’s a moral duty to stand up for yourself. 😍
Of course it’s how you stand up for yourself that matters. My first suggestion is that we replace the word good with balance and equality. That we expect the treatment we try to deliver ourselves.
Yes people will tell you shouldn’t expect the best but that’s because they don’t intend to deliver it. They will ask you to bear their slings and arrows, whilst telling you off for having expectations of decency. Don’t fall for it. Tell them you expect respect and kindness and refuse to back down. It will honestly do them good. Seriously.
In which case we must also have a reality check. The saying I labelled ‘sort of’ in the image above reminds me that although I’m trying my best I will sometimes not be at my best. Not fully aware of what others are going through, not properly tuned in. This may be because I’m distracted by something, or it may be that there’s something I don’t know that would change everything and either I haven’t been told or I’ve forgotten to stop and think.
I can face the humanity in me, and it’s something we should all do. Spiritually I was given the strong impression by humans teaching on this path that I should be more spiritual, whilst being deeply hurt by the things they were doing and saying. That made me want to mentor from a different place. How can a human truly teach Spirituality?
My answer is to work closely with my Guide and let him and the other guides do that, it’s quite frankly amazing. They have the full overview to work from, I don’t. I’m not giving my power away either, they need me to help them to reach more people and help them, That’s my role and forget ego, my life experience and my truth tells me that this is the right way.
I just threw that in as people love to tell me that doing the right thing for others represents a failure in me. A demonstration of how truly trying to be decent often gets you shot in the foot instead. 🤣
Let’s do that! Let’s be decent, let’s be a force for good, and let’s be beautifully human and stubborn about it but, let’s also consider the following:
- Being ‘good’ must not drain you.
- Being decent must not take everything from you including your sense of decency, and self.
- Just aim to be the best version of yourself, load regular updates, but DO NOT load the updates ‘soft’ or ‘pushover’.
- Never be too great to listen to others, or so daft as to fully take on board what are only their opinions based on their life experience.
- Be grateful for all the good things, but don’t try to be grateful for the hurtful ones. It’s one thing to know they taught you a lot, but don’t keep embracing that method of learning. There are better ways to learn that are more effective. You can know that sky diving without a parachute will kill you, or you can try it to find out. Once you know that someone hurts you or something in your life isn’t working, grab a parachute and jump into endless possibilities for happiness.
I never want you to hear these words
Not long before she died I spent a week with my mum when she was taking her Alzheimers drugs and was beautifully lucid.
She looked at me one day and gave me a stratospheric level of compliment, the honour of which is hard to put into words, she said:
“You’re everything your father was aren’t you?”
Pause for effusive thanks, joy, and expressions of respect for that amazing moment. Wait for it…
“And it’s done you about as much good as it did him hasn’t it.”
It didn’t do me much good because I didn’t understand what true decency and goodness is. It’s taking care of the self too. The only person who will put you front and centre is you. You can’t be that in anyone else’s life, but you must must must be that in your own. It’s not selfishness, it’s pure self preservation.
Long blog, hard to sound like a positivity princess throughout, but I’m more of a realistic rebel. Think princess with a tattered dress, one shoe missing, covered in dust and grime from the needless battles of life, with earrings and tiara still firmly in place and sparkling. Don’t ask how I broke the wand though.
To your happiness and self preservation