Act One – Scene One

Photo by Monica Silvestre on
The curtains rise
And then they fall
This is my life - my one and all
I know I’m watched
I hear my name
They shout “encore”
And sometimes “shame”

I tread these boards and utter words
I hear the echo
Am I heard?
I throw my voice
I know my lines
My words the link connecting time

Do you know me? 
Do I know you?
It matters not who loveth who
Time standing still
Time moving on
Performance lived
Then said
Now gone

Should I laugh?
Should I be sad?
Today I’m good
Tomorrow bad

Who can tell me?
Who can judge?
Who thinks I’m nice?
Who bears a grudge?

Who wears what mask?
Who needs of me?
I turn around
What do I see?

So many parts for me to play
A daughter once
A wife today
Someone who works
A mum who cares
A timid mouse
Someone who dares

I get it wrong
I get it right
To your chagrin
To your delight

You judge so much
But who am I?
I am the truth
You make the lie

The thing that hurts
Where I get lost
This is my life
I’m not the boss

This is no stage
This is no game
This is me in all but name

I stand before you in my truth
To take a fall
Or raise the roof

The silence waits 
Applause or strife?

This is no play
This is my life!

Deb Hawken


Published by debdancingstarhawken7

I'm a writer, public speaker, medium, and spiritual thinker. I suffered from acute anxiety from the age of 16 until I was well into my 50s, after fearlessly exploring many ideas, philosophies, and tools, I finally found methods that helped me return my mind to a better normal. One of the things I hated about anxiety was the way people treated me like a fool or a problem, I have two degrees and I'm a (much) retired black belt, my IQ is decent, but I constantly felt like a complete idiot, something that was exacerbated by never feeling like the real me. The girl who could laugh endlessly about the smallest things, and had a real excitement about what life had to offer her. I didn't need anyone else to tell me I wasn't 'right', I knew that better than anyone. My mission now is to support people suffering as I did with a message of support with what they're going through, tools and ideas that might help, and a strong message of hope for the future. At 63, which I am at the time of writing, many people I know are in a rut, yet having beaten anxiety I'm now doing more with my life than I ever did when I was struggling just to get up in the morning, let alone face the day. It's a wonderful feeling - so the main message is that it doesn't matter how long you've been struggling or what age you are, when you beat anxiety you will get an entirely new lease of life - and that's fantastic at any age. On a personal note I'm married to my soul mate, we have 5 cats, and I live in the middle of the UK. I follow a number of fantastic thinkers, as it's important to immerse yourself in healthy thinking as often as you can, I'm a Toastmaster and professional public speaker, and I keep life simple and encourage my clients to do the same, and my friends.

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