Seeking Nothing

As I sit
staring into the space where nothing is

I ask myself “what am I seeking?”
silence replies

I wait
thinking the world will turn
and in turning
the answer will appear
and the space will be filled

There is nothing
an immense field of
just nothing

A voice speaks

“If you don’t know what you want
how then can it be provided?
They also wait that only sit and stare.”

not helpful
more thinking to do?


Deb Hawken
April 2023


Published by debdancingstarhawken7

I'm a writer, public speaker, medium, and spiritual thinker. I suffered from acute anxiety from the age of 16 until I was well into my 50s, after fearlessly exploring many ideas, philosophies, and tools, I finally found methods that helped me return my mind to a better normal. One of the things I hated about anxiety was the way people treated me like a fool or a problem, I have two degrees and I'm a (much) retired black belt, my IQ is decent, but I constantly felt like a complete idiot, something that was exacerbated by never feeling like the real me. The girl who could laugh endlessly about the smallest things, and had a real excitement about what life had to offer her. I didn't need anyone else to tell me I wasn't 'right', I knew that better than anyone. My mission now is to support people suffering as I did with a message of support with what they're going through, tools and ideas that might help, and a strong message of hope for the future. At 63, which I am at the time of writing, many people I know are in a rut, yet having beaten anxiety I'm now doing more with my life than I ever did when I was struggling just to get up in the morning, let alone face the day. It's a wonderful feeling - so the main message is that it doesn't matter how long you've been struggling or what age you are, when you beat anxiety you will get an entirely new lease of life - and that's fantastic at any age. On a personal note I'm married to my soul mate, we have 5 cats, and I live in the middle of the UK. I follow a number of fantastic thinkers, as it's important to immerse yourself in healthy thinking as often as you can, I'm a Toastmaster and professional public speaker, and I keep life simple and encourage my clients to do the same, and my friends.

3 thoughts on “Seeking Nothing

  1. Dear Deb, this is very deep but wonderful for some people who have yet to solve that problem. I sat and reflected after reading this. Am I true to myself if I say; ‘I want nothing but for my dogs to enjoy good quality of life’. They did not choose my lifestyle, I chose it for them. That’s all I want apart from world peace, but we all NEED that. Thank you for sharing the benefit of your wisdom.

    Liked by 1 person

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