Do you think we’re shaped more by our experiences or by who we are?
This references the difference between drifting into the person you became by being born and growing up, and arriving at a place in your life when you realise that the person you are doesn’t feel authentic. You are you, and yet not you.
I came to such a place in my life. I had hit a brick wall and it made me aware that that I wasn’t anyone. I was a mismatch of everyone I knew because I spent my life having to change personalities to stay out of trouble. It was a horrible moment. There was no me.
Fortunately I had a friend who was a hypnotherapist and we worked through this together.
I learned that it was my choice who I wanted to be, I wasn’t created by default, I was re-writable. Not complete, but work in progress and progression was possible.
I realised that I didn’t know who I was or what I thought, and I needed to find out.
With a bit of help from my friend, and by exploring different thought practices, philosophies, self-help, and ways of life, I was able to consciously choose my reactions rather than keep on repeating the same pattern.
I am now shaped by what I chose to become. Not my parents, my elders, my teachers, or my friends. I am my choices.
Not everyone will arrive at the same crossroads I did, but if you do realise you’re not comfortable with who you are, you can rebuild yourself. You can take conscious steps and make conscious decisions, so that you act in alignment with a person you can admire and respect.
But you will need to learn to think differently, and literally change your mind for the better. Deleting the person you used to be, and pasting in a new version of you that is you.
Once you become aware of the ‘wrong’ behaviour, it will take no time at all to modify it. All it takes is recognising jarring notes when words or actions don’t sit well with you, then changing them.
Once you start the ball rolling you will find yourself in a whole new ballpark called ‘the real me!’
That’s what my life experience has taught me, shaping yourself must be done consciously, and by you.
Best love
Amorah – Deb
Deb Hawken - Amorah 