I Have no Goals

How often do you say “no” to things that would interfere with your goals?

I used to have goals, then I lost the muse and the feeling of being compelled to write with it. It was a significant loss of the self.

Through that I learned how important support and encouragement are, how vital being with like-minded souls is. I’ve not had that again.

I’ve learned to be wary of people working in teams, because I simply can’t bear the subtle undermining and infighting.

I once wrote a poem that began “I’m a thousand years older than you…”. I’ve felt that way for most of my life. Not supercilious, or better than, certainly not great, just “how can you possibility not see the futility of this?”

To me this isn’t even wisdom, just logic. Work together or don’t. If you can’t work in a team work alone. Oddly I often can’t work in a team because I can actually work in a team. It just has to be right team, and when it is it’s really amazing.

People who are capable of this are few and far between, and pearls beyond price. I still hold my old university team in my heart because they were extraordinary.

No goals – but things change

All in all this moved me to the situation of protecting my sanity as my main goal. Not reaching out, not chasing my dreams, just trying not to get hurt.

And yet, and yet…

I’ve realised that I am very different now, those dreams are coming back to a different person. I’m no longer caught up in why things won’t work. I’m coming up with ways that will, bypassing all social media and focussing on my own website. Social media is dominated by those who have a fortune to promote. But there are ways to bypass that.

Never fear

We all do through times when we feel lost, maybe pointless, definitely as goalless as an overpaid football team who would fare better if they got a bonus per win rather than hundreds of thousands a week. But you can change, just relax and daydream, the ideas will filter through when the time is right.

In the meantime live, love, and laugh. That’s the creative vibe.

Best love and be safe

Amorah – Deb

Exciting P.S. So, my muse is still very much alive, that old poem came straight back through!

Ancient Wisdom

I’m a thousand years older than you
I’ve often wondered if you knew
Though I don’t remember old Spain
or the Conqueror’s reign
or the Battle of Waterloo
I feel like your Great-Great Grandmother
or your mum at the best of times
And it comes a good day
when I really can’t say
that you feel like a child of mine

Deb Hawken - 1990s

(Sometimes the whole stupid world feels that way and I can’t send them to their room.  Sigh. 🙄😉🤣)