We all know that our minds control our lives, our thoughts create our reality, and yet it took me a very long time to understand how key that information is. I used to say the words, believe the words, but I never actioned the words. I never grabbed those words by the throat, shook them in my face, and yelled at myself “why are you thinking all these negative thoughts about yourself and your life when you could be thinking great thoughts?” “Why are you staying somewhere that makes you so unhappy it feels like it’s killing you slowly when you have two feet and can vote with them?” I should have.
If you really want a happy life then you have to grab life by the throat. You have to grab hold of your mind and control it with a level of ferocity similar to a lioness protecting her cub. You have to protect that mind in exactly that same ferocious way. If ever you say the words “this is/they are doing my head in” panic at once.
Yes panic. Take it very seriously. Your head (mind) is the only thing you have to help you create a happy life, attract great experiences, make fantastic decisions, and keeping it together is equally as important as taking care of your body. Perhaps more so, because in taking care of your mind you will be avoiding a lot of the stress that also affects the body in the form of tension and stress.
Ideas
This is not an exhaustive list but it’s a good start.
- If you’re unhappy take that seriously. It does not matter that anyone else doesn’t think you have a reason to be unhappy, it’s your life, your mind, you rule.
- It doesn’t even matter if you’re wrong or just being negative, as you start to gain control of your life and actively seek happiness you will begin to see the difference between being a grump and having a real problem.
- When you’re unhappy, act. No one else will. No one else can.
- Asking the world and its brother for an opinion will only confuse you. Better to stick to two or three people who know you well and definitely have your best interests at heart.
- I knew someone once who’d ask everyone they knew for advice, admit that we were all saying the same thing, yet no matter how many times we told them, they just called again to ask for the same advice. They didn’t want to act on that advice no matter that it was the only way anyone could see to solve their issues. The advice was not right for them. You’ll only act when you find your solution.
- Don’t be afraid to be wrong or get things wrong, that’s what keeps you stuck in back places and relationships. Move forward, learn, move forward, repeat.
- Self-awareness is key. If you can’t see that you’re following a repeat pattern it won’t matter that everyone else can. If you can’t see that you’re at the bottom of your decisions, or no decisions (not acting is a decision), then it won’t matter that everyone else can. Face yourself fearlessly, admit to yourself what you’re doing, and work out what steps you can comfortably take towards ending that pattern.
- Pigeon steps. Giant leaps for mankind are great for astronauts in weightless conditions, they’re not so good for problem solving. Stop. Think. Reflect on your thinking. Maybe do a vision board on the problem asking yourself what the ideal outcome would be, find out what you’re genuinely thinking. Be honest with yourself, you don’t need to tell anyone else.
- If you don’t protect your mind you will not be in a mental or emotional space to create change. A damaged, preoccupied mind, is like an old banger of a car only held together by rust, one emergency stop and the engine will fall out! A damaged mind won’t make good decisions, or create empowering emotions. It will create slob in front of the tv with a bowl of popcorn syndrome.
- Finally: It’s your life, the only one you have, don’t live it by trying to walk the path called “what society/everyone else thinks I should do”. It will never work.
To happy thoughts
Deb xx
Deb Hawken - Amorah 