Yes That!

Why do you blog?

I blog because the muse went away taking an essential part of me with it.

I was a poet and playwright. I was on a roll I was alive! I was vibrant. I’d had a play produced that was compared favourably to a Terence Rattigan performed in the West End by professionals! Bless my group who bought it alive.

Then years of being dragged down by people who had no joy, no wonder, weighed on me. Draining and downing me. I stopped dancing. I stopped laughing. My lightness lifted away.

Those happy, light, dancing energies are the ones writers thrive on. Yes we plumb the depths of emotion, often struggling ourselves, but we turn that into fire and passion, we word what other people can’t say.

We unlock the struggles, delve into them, shape them, question them, rearrange them. Sometimes we even make them beautiful, and manageable. But we take them on, and face them down, for everyone who can’t do that.

We do it with understanding and compassion because these are our struggles, and we know. We want to help.

In expressing it we learn too.

I lost that because someone close to me did not understand that you are a (happy, blissful, willing) slave to that energy. They kept disrupting the flow until the muse couldn’t fight the weight.

Bless it, it has popped back from time to time, I wrote the 16 poems of the ‘All’ series in about two hours. They poured into my heart and fingers. ‘It’s back’ I thought, thank you God. It didn’t stay. Or I didn’t.

So I blog and I’m grateful that I do. It makes me write. You read it, and you give me hope. Every like does more for me that you will ever know. It’s a tiny speck of life force.

When it comes to making sense of things, you may enjoy “All the Light You Cannot See”.

Or there is this one that I wrote when I was working as a Medium. I know one very dear person who needs this reminder.

I Thought

I thought that when you passed away
And slipped into the light
That I would no more know the day
And you no more the night

Yet I find when all is done
You and I are always one
Never more just I and me
Always - ever - only - we

When in the old familiar places
And with the old familiar faces
I know that through my eyes we see
The vision that’s enchanting me

You’ll never leave while I am here
And I no longer need to fear
When I walk through that golden gate
As must surely be my fate
The single I that’s served as we

Will ever more be
You and Me
💖

Deb Hawken
2004

Miss you Jacob Jay Nunn

Best love – especially if you understand this too well

Amorah – Deb