As I was finishing this morning’s prompt I chose a funny meme, which triggered a creativity loop.
Perspective is personal
My Guide Amos suddenly comes out with the most unexpected things.
I was worrying about a friend who has a very sad situation with a family member. Amos suddenly chimed in with:
“They’re both completely right.”
Which triggered an ‘excuse me, what?’ reaction.
As humans we tend to think in terms of right and wrong on both sides, but here he was saying that everyone is completely right. So why?
Because we can only come from one understanding and perspective, our own. We are our life experience. We can’t be that of anyone else, we may know some facts but we don’t know how the hurt and reaction has manifested and affected them.
Humans don’t react in the same way to the exact same thing.
Never the twain will meet
Yes we’re supposed to empathise, we’re actually supposed to talk to each other. That often turns into an argument because twains have never been good at feeling their way.
It’s not the listening and the hearing that counts, it’s the feeling coming from a person. If you can feel how a person is feeling you can gain a far closer understanding as to why they’re reacting the way they are.
Fear of being wrong is often a key in miscommunication, I got into trouble the other day for telling someone their thinking was wrong.
It wasn’t a problem because people feel safe to talk to me, knowing they will be heard and receive a thoughtful reply.
You can tell me you feel I’m wrong and it doesn’t phase me. My position is that being human is extremely hard and we will be wrong at times.
Where the ‘everyone is right’ Amos clause came neatly in was that the other person was exactly right in their motivation, and I was entirely right that they needed to be taking better care of themselves. If the helper goes down…?
She cared about her friend, I cared about her. We were actually on exactly the same page.
That’s a very gentle example of a more complex issue.
Polar opposition
If you land up at polar opposites you miss that middle ground. You take a stance and understanding flies out the window, the discussion becomes two defensive arguments.
If however, you understand that this is another person in front of you who has led a completely different life, whose triggers will be different, and whose reasoning comes from that life you haven’t led, then you can bring about a far better outcome.
Respect differences. Remember you both feel right. Avoid the freight train of outrage and broken relationships. Let the light in you recognise the light in them.
After all, we are all soul. We were created from common ground.
Best love
Deb – Amorah
Deb Hawken - Amorah 