People Watching

What are your favorite sports to watch and play?

It’s not a game but it is fascinating I love seeing the truth reveal itself despite what a person is saying, or thinks they’re saying. We’re revealed by what we do and whether that matches our words.

The interesting thing is, and it’s why I can say that I enjoy people watching, I’ve rarely seen a person I don’t like. Most people vastly underestimate their strengths, allowing their perceived weaknesses to undermine them.

They feel a failure a lot of the time without questioning what failure actually is.

It’s only bad to be bad at something if you really want to do it. when you realise you don’t want to do whatever it is, then it doesn’t matter that you can’t do it.

What use is an English degree to someone born to be a master crafts-person? They may feel a failure because they got low marks, and carry that failure with them, instead of saying thank God I failed otherwise I wouldn’t have discovered what I love doing.

Same with being a human. They may be embarrassed by their anxiety, yet not realise how compassionate and supportive it’s made them toward others.

Training

If you’re going to be a people watcher you do need some skills though:

• Recognition of and respect for our shared human condition.
• The ability to hear what people mean when they’re talking to you, rather than your mind translating it via your life experience. Someone who was bitten by a dog will not trust that your fluffy pumpkins Rottweiler is a real sweetie.
• Understanding of how hard this life can be for some people. If you don’t judge, you learn from others, life is more richly rewarding. You become more understanding and compassionate.
• Knowing when someone is showing symptoms of stress, anxiety, grief, even when they’re pretending to be okay, and showing them that you’re there if they need you. Show don’t tell.
• Recognising that you’re not the most important person in the world, your skin colour isn’t prettier, your nationality better, your religion or country more important, or right. Your gender isn’t the right one. They’re all right.
• Looking for the best. If you do you’ll find it.
• Most importantly, knowing that putting someone down never raises them up. Don’t expect better if you’re telling them they’re incapable of that.

A useful response?

Talking to my husband this evening I mentioned some people that I’m reasonably certain have weighed, measured, and found me wanting. I said to Tony that there’s only one response to people who tell you you’re not good enough:

Are you perfect?

If they say no:

Well perhaps you shouldn’t criticise others until you are.

If they say yes:

You wouldn’t be criticising me if you were.

😉

With love

Deb xx