Clarence here
Have you seen the news reports on polls about the election?
The public trusts no one. They believe that no party can deliver on their financial promises because the country is broke.
Now we know where common sense lives, amongst the public.
The recent debates have been predictable. Farage’s conviction has half the life of nuclear half life, but then he hasn’t had a lot of time to prepare for running the country.
Mordaunt just keeps talking, if only she were interesting it would help. She reminds me of an old school matron who ‘isn’t having any of that nonsense’ and has no intention of letting young upstarts get a word in edgewise. Even though Angela Rayner is neither young nor an upstart. No disrespect to Angela, she has years on the clock in her job and plenty of experience.
Rayner is actually doing an excellent job of standing quietly, smiling gently, and letting Mordaunt show her true colours. Masterfully understated.
The rest were just normally boring.
If you’re wondering why I’m not posting regularly, to be honest I’d need them to be a lot more interesting so that I’d have something to say.
However, the other night I was sitting there knitting a tea cosy, trying to remain interested, learning the true meaning of complete disinterest, when Starmer came on the news and made my day!
He said that Labour were “pro-business, pro- worker, and procreation”.
You finally have it in words – have more babies! Enjoy!
Your bored political reporter
Clarence
P.S. I’m off to try to find a woman who will put up with me so that I can help with the whole baby thing, it seems like a wonderful thing to do for your country. For once they’re talking a language I can make sense of. Wish me luck, I’ve never had a girlfriend for more than a week. Most of them aren’t interested in winkling, which surprises me, but there’s nowt so peculiar as folk – to use a boringly safe version of a formerly wonderful colloquialism.
Deb Hawken - Amorah 