Too Many

What sacrifices have you made in life?

As many people with severe anxiety will know, the effort to control your mind and keep doing everyday things takes up most of your energy.

As such much of my life hasn’t so much been lived as battled through.

It sounds great to be a survivor who has fought anxiety and mostly won, everyone has their moments, but it isn’t. What’s lost isn’t greater than the gains of getting through and winning, but it’s certainly equal.

My potential was sacrificed. My talent was sacrificed. Living was sacrificed. I fought like a demon but there was so much that I couldn’t do. I simply didn’t have the energy.

I woke up most mornings exhausted from being asleep.

If you know someone with severe anxiety that leaves you despairing because you don’t know what to do to help them, I hope these thoughts will help:

They’re fighting a 24/7 lifelong battle with their own minds. They know it makes no sense to others, and it makes no sense to them. The hurtful part is that underneath all the mess, there is a world famous playwright, a top sportsperson, a singer with an unbelievable voice, a world traveller who can’t drive or walk to the bottom of their road.

They’re exhausted beyond measure. Waking up and getting ready for work is the equivalent of climbing Everest with no oxygen! Let alone raising a family, keeping a home. Thinking straight!

They’re not weak they are strong beyond measure. But that entire strength goes towards keeping them upright and they haven’t got a lot left for anything else.

If you’re one of them, respect yourself, it’s a horrible battle and a terrible illness.

Then go and look up Joe Dispenza, Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself.

Read that. There is also a meditation that goes with it. Do that. He breaks you in gently.

It works. Trust me. 40 years of acute anxiety gone in a month.

There are some very important things about how the mind works that you don’t know. Like everything, you only need the right knowledge.

And the will to help yourself.

You might feel that recovery would force you to go out and that’s too scary. Recovery would mean that going out is not a problem at all.

Living will be a joy.

Deb xx