My Why

“You’ve had the hardest life emotionally of anyone I’ve ever met
and you didn’t deserve a moment of it.”

That statement came from a lady who knew me from the age of 9, and was close to my family for many years. She only felt able to tell me that after both my parents had passed. Was I glad to hear it? Did it help? In all honesty no. In some ways it was easier to think that there was something wrong with me, than to realise I’d had so many years of hurtful treatment that I didn’t deserve.

As such my strong message is: don’t automatically think you’re to blame; adults can be driven by the past in ways they never think to question. Thank goodness I found a mentor who taught me to question, and spirit guides who taught me a different way of being.

I was never abused

As soon as I put my feet on my new path I knew that I wanted to help people like me. The people who ‘nothing bad happened to’. Apart from a slap on the leg, which was acceptable during my childhood, I was never subject to physical violence of any kind for any reason. I was well housed, well fed, well cared for, and loved; yet quietly, inside, I was broken.

I lived in fear for over 40 years; a nameless fear that suddenly came from nowhere and never went away. I’d have good moments, but it was there like a gremlin on my shoulder, giggling, ready to pounce the instant I relaxed.

I would never not try to help anyone who is troubled, I have been able to help and support victims of terrible events, but I knew that someone needed to be there for the people who didn’t know what to say. Didn’t know what was wrong with them.

My first love

My work has gone through many iterations, and as a writer I’ve written for several spiritual magazines, including Spirit and Destiny and Kindred Spirit. I’m working on plays and poetry now. I’m currently testing ideas for a second book. Writing is my first love, but my spiritual mentoring groups are right up there with it.

I started the groups during Covid and they’re still going strong five years later. We work together to focus our thoughts, handle our emotions, and create our own ways of coping with life. Not in any classical way, it’s mainly visualisation with a strong point and focus.

Do get in touch if you’re interested. I know that you’d normally expect a huge sales page, but the work I do is verry personal and quite unusual, so a free chat with me, via email if you prefer, is the best way for us to connect. I don’t pressure anyone, it never works. You’ll know if it’s right for you and I’ll be guided by that.

Permanent help at home

You can pick this up on Amazon.

This is a handbook, as it says, because I became fed up with people telling me who I was and how I needed to change. I didn’t find that helpful as there were far too many different opinions in play, so I wrote a map book, you choose the starting point and destination and I’ll suggest the routes you can take.

No adult needs telling what to do and how to do it. Most adults who are feeling lost are that way because people have told them who they are and what to do and when. All you need to do is keep the programming that works, ditch what doesn’t, and literally re-make up your own mind.

To your happiness

Deb xx