Not so much fail

Write about your most epic baking or cooking fail.

Perfect poetic justice

I was very rarely a naughty child ever, certainly not mischievous. But one cold autumn day in about 1974, my bestie and I decided that freezing our extremities off watching a game of school netball wasn’t desirable.

So we went to the headmistress, played the not feeling great card, and asked if there was anything we could do inside to be helpful. She said we could tidy the domestic science ingredients cupboard.

For some random reason the devil got into us, and we thought how much fun it would be to replace the sugar with salt and vice versa. We spent the time working out what could be swapped convincingly. Or added. This is where I paid for my hilarious levels of genius.

There was never any comeback for what we’d done, and we forgot about it. A few weeks later I’m making a dessert as part of my cooking course and I decided to add custard.

I made the custard, decanted it into a jug, thought it looked a bit thick. Left it to cool for a couple of minutes. Went to pour it out, solid as a rock.

I spent a good few minutes cutting the custard (plus cornflour) from the jug with a knife, and reflecting on the fact that I really wasn’t suited to mischief making.

That was the last time I ever attempted a practical joke. We did leave the cupboard nice and tidy though.

Deb xx