Stop Torturing Your Mind

Let it be!

Anxiety isn’t nice and it can make you feel slip into self blame and self loathing at times. Asking yourself over and over again why your mind has to do this, what’s wrong with you, why are you like this and other people aren’t? It’s something you need to stop doing.

I’ve already covered in another blog the fact that you’ve got to this place for a reason, and just as you wouldn’t walk on a broken ankle without a plaster, you can’t put your mind through hell because it’s just had enough!


Even if you did something stupid to break your ankle, you might be a bit miffed with yourself, you might say a few curse words and call yourself a few names, but you’d probably land up giggling at yourself sooner or later and telling the story at the dinner table, to huge gusts of laughter. You’d forgive yourself, probably concluding that you’ve paid the price and there’s nothing more to be done.

Now forgive yourself for being anxious. In all honesty why doesn’t really matter, yes as the person you are now you could have made better decisions, but you’re judging your past, younger, less aware self and finding them wanting. You’re doing the best you an as the person you are at this time, and they were doing the best they could as the person they were at that time. Plus:

It usually takes the words and actions of more than one person,
and more than one difficult event to make a person anxious.


Allow yourself to heal, as I say over and over again (and guess how I know), meditate. As importantly, build some fun into your life, read enjoyable books where everyone doesn’t die in a plague, natural disaster, at the hands of a serial killer. Read something that makes you feel good.

Read books about the way the mind works and learn to understand yours, Joe Dispenza, Gregg Braden, and Bruce Lipton, to name but three, are awesome on these subjects.

Play happy music as much as possible, always have it on in the background if you can. Get friends or family to join you on a day out, go somewhere interesting, get into discussions about what you saw. Go the beach. There is so much positive you can do that will allow that mind to rest and recuperate. A holiday would be ideal, with some fun people.

Learn to Manifest

I’m a Law of Attraction Practitioner and Infinite Possibilities Trainer ™, and one thing I love about the whole Law of Attraction, Cosmic Ordering, thing, is that you have to train yourself to think about what you do want, not what you don’t, and you don’t have to worry about how it will all happen. Miracles have happened, and fairly regularly to those who practice manifestation. All you really need to do is:

Visualise – show up – do something (Mike Dooley)

In other words daydream (paying detailed attention to that daydream) about the ideal life for you, then go out, meet people, research, think about what you could do.

Do anything that involves thinking about what you do want, how you want to feel, and the sort of life you want to live. Do nothing that involves focusing on how you’re feeling and where you are at the moment, positive change and a happy life should be your own focus. The more you hold that vision the more likely you are to find surprising events turning up in your life. The right job on a better wage, the right house where you feel happy, a great car, friends, maybe romance.


Think in only the best language, speak in only the best words. Talk about a great job, fantastic friends, plenty of money, a wonderful car, a terrific holiday, how well you get along with people.

If you ask for an okay car, that’s what you’ll get. If you have a habit of doing things like that then sit down and ask yourself one very important question:

If others believe that they deserve the best, why don’t I?

The only difference between those you’d wish to be like and you, is that they’ve done different things and made difference decisions. You can do that too.

Believe that you deserve the best and you will get it. Deliberately and consciously choose that belief and nurture it.

If bad thoughts or old thoughts try to get in the way just say ‘change’ or ‘stop’ and deliberately think a good thought.

It will work.

To your happiness

Deb xx


Published by debdancingstarhawken7

I'm a writer, public speaker, medium, and spiritual thinker. I suffered from acute anxiety from the age of 16 until I was well into my 50s, after fearlessly exploring many ideas, philosophies, and tools, I finally found methods that helped me return my mind to a better normal. One of the things I hated about anxiety was the way people treated me like a fool or a problem, I have two degrees and I'm a (much) retired black belt, my IQ is decent, but I constantly felt like a complete idiot, something that was exacerbated by never feeling like the real me. The girl who could laugh endlessly about the smallest things, and had a real excitement about what life had to offer her. I didn't need anyone else to tell me I wasn't 'right', I knew that better than anyone. My mission now is to support people suffering as I did with a message of support with what they're going through, tools and ideas that might help, and a strong message of hope for the future. At 63, which I am at the time of writing, many people I know are in a rut, yet having beaten anxiety I'm now doing more with my life than I ever did when I was struggling just to get up in the morning, let alone face the day. It's a wonderful feeling - so the main message is that it doesn't matter how long you've been struggling or what age you are, when you beat anxiety you will get an entirely new lease of life - and that's fantastic at any age. On a personal note I'm married to my soul mate, we have 5 cats, and I live in the middle of the UK. I follow a number of fantastic thinkers, as it's important to immerse yourself in healthy thinking as often as you can, I'm a Toastmaster and professional public speaker, and I keep life simple and encourage my clients to do the same, and my friends.

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