The One

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Most, but not all, humans dedicate a great deal of their life to meeting ‘the one’. Some are lucky that happens early in life, others have to wait a bit or a lot longer, and maybe appreciate it more because of that.

If you’re a person who’s still waiting and wondering when this seemingly mythical person is going to wander into your life, I thought I’d share a couple of true life stories to inspire you!

My parents

My mum and dad were together for over 50 years and married for over 40, but their meeting was quite original.

My dad was in the merchant navy, he sailed on the great Queens Elizabeth and Mary. He was adopted, and from a home that didn’t make the teenager happy but he later looked upon with gratitude, knowing that he was loved. As such he left home at the age of 16 and joined up.

My mum was from a very happy home, she had two sisters, but even though she was the eldest she was also the quietest and probably the most naïve. Her parents actually knew my father for a few years before my mum met him, as did both her middle and younger sisters. However, nan and grandad made sure my mum didn’t meet him, because he was in the process of waiting 5 years for a divorce, and much as they liked him a great deal he was troubled, and all loving parents want the best of the best for their children don’t they. It was really easy because they knew him from the local pub and my mum was teetotal, but a sixth sense told them not even to mention her to him, or him to her.

My father used to miss the newspapers, so on one occasion he asked my nan would she write to him every week and enclose that week’s papers. She said yes, meant no because she couldn’t spell very well, and asked my mum to write to my dad and sign the letters ‘from Nell’. So my mum was writing to my dad and he was receiving letters from his future wife, without knowing each other existed.

The meeting!

My mum went out one evening, and when she got back to her front door she realised that she’d forgotten her keys. She knew her parents would be at the pub, so she went down to find them, except she was too shy to go in so she waited outside.

The door opened and the epitome of tall, dark, and handsome, came out to have a cigarette. He saw my mum hovering by the door and asked “Can I help you little girl?” Mum was 23 and looked 16, she even had to show my paternal grandmother her birth certificate before she would believe her. Mum explained that she’d forgotten her keys and could he please go and ask her parents to bring some keys out.

Dad obviously asked who her parents were, and she said Nell and Charlie. Dad looked at her and said “But you’re not Vera, and you’re not Diana, who are you?” She replied “I’m Barbara”. That was that, my grandparents fears were well founded as they were together from that moment. Mum waited 5 years to marry dad and had to marry him in a registrar’s office as church weddings weren’t available to divorcees in those days. She didn’t care, looked gorgeous, and everyone who went said the party at the pub afterwards was the party of the century.

Next…my story!


Published by debdancingstarhawken7

I'm a writer, public speaker, medium, and spiritual thinker. I suffered from acute anxiety from the age of 16 until I was well into my 50s, after fearlessly exploring many ideas, philosophies, and tools, I finally found methods that helped me return my mind to a better normal. One of the things I hated about anxiety was the way people treated me like a fool or a problem, I have two degrees and I'm a (much) retired black belt, my IQ is decent, but I constantly felt like a complete idiot, something that was exacerbated by never feeling like the real me. The girl who could laugh endlessly about the smallest things, and had a real excitement about what life had to offer her. I didn't need anyone else to tell me I wasn't 'right', I knew that better than anyone. My mission now is to support people suffering as I did with a message of support with what they're going through, tools and ideas that might help, and a strong message of hope for the future. At 63, which I am at the time of writing, many people I know are in a rut, yet having beaten anxiety I'm now doing more with my life than I ever did when I was struggling just to get up in the morning, let alone face the day. It's a wonderful feeling - so the main message is that it doesn't matter how long you've been struggling or what age you are, when you beat anxiety you will get an entirely new lease of life - and that's fantastic at any age. On a personal note I'm married to my soul mate, we have 5 cats, and I live in the middle of the UK. I follow a number of fantastic thinkers, as it's important to immerse yourself in healthy thinking as often as you can, I'm a Toastmaster and professional public speaker, and I keep life simple and encourage my clients to do the same, and my friends.

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