Hi and Why!

You are my why, and I’m yours. I’m writing this because there was a time that no one understood me, I had no support. In truth only people who’ve had anxiety really get it, really understand the replacement of the self with someone you never wanted to be. Only we know how much it hurts, how tiring, sad, lonely, and bewildering it is. I know the way out and I’m here to offer those ideas and techniques to you.

Take a deep breath

Okay, so you’re suffering from this difficult condition, maybe you have been for some time. It’s dragging you down, you’re probably tired, you’ve lost your sparkle, you may be verging on depression. The important thing to remember is that many people have felt as you do, and they have recovered. These people were no cleverer, no more intelligent, no more capable than you. It’s just that somehow, one way or another, they bought themselves back into balance, and changed their lives by changing their mind and attitude. I am one of those people.

I’ve put a little about me here, but the important message for you to remember is that I was not special, I was simply prepared to change in order to recover. you can too. So take a deep breath, try and relax, because I’m going to tell you how I did it, and the techniques are easy, using them will be as hard as you make it. Choose simplicity!

My life started off badly, mum and I nearly died the day I was born, and I was told 3 things when I was old enough to remember them. My father’s first words to me were, “ooh you, it’s all your fault”, my mother’s were “very nice, now take it away”, and when I was still a young child my father told me that when asked if the surgeon could only save one of us, who should he choose. My father told me he said “my wife of course!” As an adult I understand that, as a child I did not. I would probably have said “both, no choices!” Things went downhill from there until I was completely broken, a laughing stock, a hypochondriac (turns out I wasn’t, but more later), bullied, 3rd best in a family of 2 children, in a miserable marriage, miserable job, house I hated, with a fractured mind, wondering what the heck had happened to the real me!

So that’s the flavour, enjoy the rest of the posts, and here’s your first tip:

Anxiety puts you into fight and flight, breathe in for a count of 5 and out for a count of 8, and it will help you to calm down.


Published by debdancingstarhawken7

I'm a writer, public speaker, medium, and spiritual thinker. I suffered from acute anxiety from the age of 16 until I was well into my 50s, after fearlessly exploring many ideas, philosophies, and tools, I finally found methods that helped me return my mind to a better normal. One of the things I hated about anxiety was the way people treated me like a fool or a problem, I have two degrees and I'm a (much) retired black belt, my IQ is decent, but I constantly felt like a complete idiot, something that was exacerbated by never feeling like the real me. The girl who could laugh endlessly about the smallest things, and had a real excitement about what life had to offer her. I didn't need anyone else to tell me I wasn't 'right', I knew that better than anyone. My mission now is to support people suffering as I did with a message of support with what they're going through, tools and ideas that might help, and a strong message of hope for the future. At 63, which I am at the time of writing, many people I know are in a rut, yet having beaten anxiety I'm now doing more with my life than I ever did when I was struggling just to get up in the morning, let alone face the day. It's a wonderful feeling - so the main message is that it doesn't matter how long you've been struggling or what age you are, when you beat anxiety you will get an entirely new lease of life - and that's fantastic at any age. On a personal note I'm married to my soul mate, we have 5 cats, and I live in the middle of the UK. I follow a number of fantastic thinkers, as it's important to immerse yourself in healthy thinking as often as you can, I'm a Toastmaster and professional public speaker, and I keep life simple and encourage my clients to do the same, and my friends.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: